Counting Blessings

There are days when I just fail to count my blessings. Of the goodness and wonderful things that have been gifted to me.

When I come home and Wispy runs to the gate to say 'ammee' (that's his version of mummy).

And when both mess around on the bed with me and Wispy comes to give me a bite and Sprong joins in attacking their mommy to much giggles.

When beautiful people paint their stories in my life. And spread a little of their goodness.

From K, I have learnt so much about relationships and what it means to be a woman with priorities. I extract her wisdom and keep it close. When I grow up, I want to be like K, so in control of her life and such a kindred spirit.

With MT, I have dreams of conquering a new world as we start thinking of consolidating synergies. With MT, I can say let's start a TV channel and she will say OK without batting eyelid and asking 'but how on earth!' MT makes me feel like I can take on the world.

With Blabs, the only person in the world who will never judge me after I have spilled out my guts and showed the entrails.

I think I never say enough to each one of them how much they mean to me, each one a sunbeam that streams into my heart.

On some days, it does get so, so, so hard....

There are days when I am a banshee, screaming at the kids to sit up, eat and not drop anything on the floor. I am shouting, shouting, shouting. I am tired, fed up of cleaning and washing them up and cooking and worst of all, feeding. I HATE feeding them. Why can't they self feed. Especially Wispy who want to play with his food after 5 seconds.

Sprong comes up and says 'please mommy don't be angry at me' and I STOP. And continue after an hour. There are days when I am such a horrible mom.

There are days when it is all so, so hard.

random

Frenzied weekend. So much on my mind.

Went Bollywood dancing last Friday. It means basically wiggly hands and bum to bollywood songs. Had lots of fun and also fab workout. The last exercise I did was delivering wispy and that is already 2 years.

So about time I start a proper regime and bollywood dancing is pretty cool I must say.

M's capacity to drive me up the wall increases. There are days when I look at him and realise that the only thing in common we have are the 2 boys.

Sigh.